Monday, August 30, 2010

Home again

I was gone less than a week, but it amazes me how quickly I slipped into my old family role, how well it fit around me when I stepped off the plane and caught sight of my sister Norma Jean. The time with her, my brother-in-law Pete, Allison and her new baby consumed me for five days. I didn't feel like I had ever been anywhere else.
Sisters in the Pentagon Dining Room, photo by Pete
I never feel like any time has passed when I see Norma Jean, because in my mind's eye, the person she is, her essence, is continually present in my heart, and I don't remember that we haven't seen each other for years. We take up where we left off as though it was yesterday. We laughed a lot, cried a little, and both made cooing noises over Lexie, the newest member of our family. Norma Jean is now a grandmother and I have another great-niece.

Pete and I connected in a way we haven't before, and I think airing some old resentments helped, not to mention that we all feel the number of times we will be together like this are dwindling. His COPD has advanced somewhat, and for years now he has mentioned that we might not see each other again every time we have gotten together. This time I felt he might be right, and it made every moment we were together very precious and poignant. All this going on with beautiful Lexie brand new in the world for us to enjoy and share.

When we were little, Norma Jean and I were together all the time. As we moved from place to place with our parents, the constant presence of the other helped to shield us from the changes. We were always there together. Daddy traveled a lot, but Mama didn't work outside the home and we had a family. Allison told me that today 4 out of 10 children are raised by a single mother. That is so different from the way it was when we were young.

I wrapped myself in the family feeling during the days I spent there, and I wondered several times why I didn't miss Bellingham or Smart Guy. Now I realize it was because every moment was filled with each other, not to mention the care and feeding of a two-month-old infant.

And how quickly it fell away the closer I got to home. Arriving at SeaTac at 8:00 pm, I still had to catch the 9:00 pm Airporter to Bellingham, with another couple of hours of travel ahead of me. By the time I was picked up at the Bellingham Airport by Smart Guy, I had one leg in each reality. The air of Washington State is so different from that of Washington, DC. Breathing it for half a day now has almost cleared out the DC vibes.

When I walked in the door, I felt I had arrived at home. Then I saw a note next to my iMac keyboard, and I realized that many of the things Smart Guy does for me every day become invisible and unappreciated when taken for granted. I was filled with gratitude that even while I'm not around, the computer is taken care of, the birds fed, and my plants watered. He's a keeper.
:-)

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